A Guide for When You Talk About Us

piano-571968__480.jpgHuman emotions are strong. Human connections with other humans are as well. However, sometimes those connections fade, they grow weak over time. Another thing about humans is that they love to gossip.  The following should be used to guide your conversation when you are discussing my situation. It’s the truth, there will be no room for interpretation or reading in to it. What follows is all there is to know.

My wife and I got together when I was 17 and she was 16. I loved her, I really did. Time, however, pushed us down two separate paths. I hurt her too many times to count and there were some difficulties that are none of your business. We tried to make it work, but as all things, it has come to it’s end. She did nothing wrong, she did not hurt me in any way. We, in my eyes, were just not compatible. I felt that for a very long time, and I really wanted to get us to that point, but I failed. It wasn’t her fault that I failed, just mine.

So when you are discussing my situation, be kind to her. She has been hurt worse than anyone could ever hurt. You owe that to her at the very least. Funny thing about extreme emotional situations is you find out who is there for you. In our case, the answer is no one. That s probably the worst part of it all is that she has no one to reach out to but me.

The one that hurt her and gave her this suffering is the only one she trusts. If that’s not fucked up then I don’t know what is. So, when you see her car in my drive way, thinking I’m playing games, just know that I’m being there for her because no one else can seem to do that. It’s probably not the most healthy of ways to cope, but it’s all there is. What made me leave, I’m sure is discussed quite often.

I found a mate that is on the same page as me, completely. Someone who wants the same exact things out of life. That s the only reason. You can blame her all you want, but I am the one who made the choice. I jumped, she didn’t force me to. I felt immediately freed. I confessed all my sins and I am free. Not free from my wife, that’s not what I mean, free from the secrets I’ve been holding onto since I was a teenager. You don’t need to know my secrets, youd only hurt me with them, just know there were many. Why such poor timing, I know is like the number one thing discussed.

Why Chirstmas time? My answer is a question. Is there ever a good time to do something like this? No. Plus it just happens, it’s not like I planned to do this on Christmas because I might as well create maximum suffering. No. It just happened. I hate that it did on that holiday, but I can’t control the weather. So now what,  you most definitely are discussing.

I help her as much as I can to get over me and move on. I finish the lease out on my house and then I’m gone. Far away. Washington State most likely. Create a network of people who will be there when shit hits the fan. What about the woman, you ask? That one I will leave you to figure out yourself, because fuck you, you gossiping asshole.

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